Mattress Remote
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 INTEX TWIN COMFORT AIRBED AIR BED MATTRESS with REMOTE $41.95 Time Remaining: 18d 2h 5m Buy It Now for only: $41.95 |
 NIGHT MAGIC SLEEP BED MATTRESS MASSAGER THERAPY WITH REMOTE NEWEST MODEL GREAT $68.99 Time Remaining: 20d 14h 50m Buy It Now for only: $68.99 |
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 NEW Queen Raised Air Bed Mattress AIRBED REMOTE PUMP $59.95 Time Remaining: 25d 19h 37m Buy It Now for only: $59.95 |
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Mattress Remote
“Air Bed” Mattresses: Good Idea or Just A Lot of Hot Air?
Weren’t the '80s great? That decade was positively filled with so many new innovations. The MTV network, VCRs, the Nintendo game system, cassette tapes, and the "T"-top Trans Am [just to name a few] all exploded into a blossoming mainstream popular culture like atomic bombs. Ronald Reagan was king, and the economy was booming. Since then, however, the tables have turned-- and I'm not talking "turntables." MTV no longer plays music, VCRs have been replaced with DVDs and Blue Ray, Mario and Luigi are old, and the iPod rules the day. Another 80s invention that's now a thing of the past [or should be considered one] is the "air bed" mattress.
Now, I'll have to admit that the air mattress was a cool idea... but, hey: everything in the '80s was cool. The concept of this bed was pretty innovative, but in the end, I'm afraid it's proven to be just a bunch of hot air. So why do people still in the market for these things, anyway? Just like buying an outdated VCR, or a home phone with a really long cord, you've got to ask yourself: what’s the point? Unless you like to take twenty minutes to rewind tapes, or prefer the idea of tripping over your 36-foot long phone cord every two minutes, it just doesn't make a whole lot of sense. The problem with the "air bed" can be easily identified by its own name: it’s made of air!
Just consider the inherent problem: anything with air leaks. From tires to balloons, anything that is filled by air inevitably leaks and will therefore require maintenance. Mattresses, of course, are no different. How many times have you been camping and decided to take an air mattress with you? At least once for every time you've made such an outing, I'd be willing to bet. I would also be willing to bet that you spent half your night of appreciating nature's bounty simply trying to keep the dang thing inflated. And let me guess: you’re thinking, “yeah, but those are the cheap ones you buy at Wal-Mart! What about the stronger, permanent ones? What about the kind with the remote controls?” Trust me when I tell you that they have their problems too. Stay tuned, and I'll fill you in on what they are.
The so-called "permanent" air bed consists of either one or two air chambers that are constructed inside of a polyurethane, vinyl, or rubber container. Without trying to get too technical here, I'll tell you that this container is then covered with a layer of canvas or some other fabric material. Stemming from the air chambers themselves are either one or two hoses, depending on the amount of chambers it contains. These hoses then plug into two valves that are built into an air inflater, which inflates the mattress. In the case of a dual-chambered bed, the inflaters can be controlled with a set of two remote controls that adjust the air pressure [thus changing the firmness of the mattress on each side of the bed]. Pretty smart idea, right? Wrong. There is still the ever-present possibility that the mattress will leak [and especially the vinyl ones after frequent use], among other problems: what about if the air inflater breaks? How about if the remote controls malfunction? And anybody ever seen kids having the time of their lives jumping up and down on a bed with all their might? I don't know about you, but I sure wouldn't want the headache of worrying about my children doing something to tear up my delicate air mattress. But the warranty will cover it, right? Well, no... that's what you might call "highly unlikely," as most air mattress companies do not offer long-standing warranties. And, as is true with anything else you buy: the less expensive the model, the skimpier the warranty. The company will happily explain to you, I'm sure, that if you “misuse” the bed, they cannot be held liable. Oh, and more little thing. Air mattresses are downright dangerous! "Air beds" have been known for years to suffocate children during the night due to the dips and creases in the bed caused by deflation. Sure, the air bed might give you a good night's rest-- but be aware that it could be permanent.
So let's talk alternatives, because clearly the air mattress is out. If you're anything like me, the pricetag on one of these things [upwards of two thousand dollars in some cases] seems like a lot of money for what could be a lot of irritating hassle. We could shave off a couple hundred bucks and go with a spring coil mattress, but they can certainly prove to be more pain than they're worth, and the warranty is typically no better. My suggestion for you instead: a memory foam mattress. They're becoming more and more affordable, and your odds of an ulcer due to upkeep frustrations are slim-to-none. The best part is: no worries about the kids getting sucked into a deadly mattress during the night. Memory foam is recommended by doctors who advise patients with chronic pain, as it's easy to maintain [no inflating or flipping required], relieves pressure, and increases blood flow throughout the body-- all of which means better overall health. Not only does memory foam save you from constantly having to be concerned about wear and tear, it might even save you from having to make those pesky doctor's appointments, too. And that, my friend, is even better than your favorite 80s mix-tape... as if that were possible.
About the Author
Do I have a poltergeist or ghost in my apartment?
Recently (actually, a couple of minutes ago) my remote disappeared of my bed while I went to the kitchen. When I came back, I tore my room apart, looked underneath my bed, moved my clothes and looked behind my bed to find it. I have no sheets on my bed so it was basically a bare mattress with clothes on it. Then I got up to go look near my door, turned around, and it was sitting on my bed where I was sure I left it before I had gone to the kitchen. I was like WTF??? I kind of laughed it off, but then I realized this has been happening a lot. My laptop charger will suddenly unplug itself and be completely across the room, my closet doors will open by themselves. And last night I had a dream that about a being that pinned me down in my bed, but I knew it was a dream because I because I became lucid halfway through it.
Does anyone else have this weird problem?
I wouldn't say you've got poltergeist activity, just a prankster of a spirit. The last house I lived in was like that. We'd always have things come up missing just to have them reappear minutes, hours, days, months, and occasionally years later. My biggest frustration was the mustard. The girls were little (so, it wasn't them, they couldn't reach it) and I'd make sandwiches. I love tons of mustard, they didn't like it. I'd get everything out to make sandwiches, go for the mustard, it's gone. I'd check the fridge, no mustard (even though I knew I got it out). I'd clean up the kitchen, we'd eat, and go to wash the dishes, and as every other time it would happen, there's the mustard on the counter, right where I had it. Although everything was put back up and clean, I didn't overlook the mustard. We'd have dishes disappear. We don't drink coffee, so don't use coffee cups, they would disappear, as would saucers (who uses saucers anyway?), once those were gone, then it would go to plates. Buy another set, and soon there's our missing dishes, same with silverware. Socks was another problem. All of our socks would disappear, I mean sock fulls of drawers (not everyone's at once). I couldn't wear hubby's socks and couldn't wear the girls' socks due to size. You'd have to wear a dirty pair to get through the day, go buy more, get home and there's your drawer, full of the missing socks. My badge and collar pins would disappear too, showing up later (I've got several extra sets due to this). It was cute and funny at first, became quite the nuisance. Nothing threatening or scary in the house, it was very comfortable. As for being pinned down, sounds like sleep paralysis. I've lived in a house with demons and have never been pinned down, nor have I experienced sleep paralysis, although I can imagine how frightening it would be.
MATTRESS MASSAGER SYSTEM (REMOTE CONTROL)
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